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I’ve never felt particularly affected by social media.
I’ve listened when others have mentioned their dislike for it and when they’ve explained that it creates a negativity in their head I’ve tried to understand. But if I’m completely honest I’ve found these kinds of reactions difficult to comprehend.
As an active user of social media for many years, I’ve always felt like my relationship with them was pretty healthy, or at least healthy as it could be.
Social media is the procrastinator’s dream, right? If you ever need something to distract you when you’ve got a shit ton of stuff to do, then your platform of choice has got your back implicitly!
For me, it’s always been a bit of fun and a way to waste time. It’s also a fantastic way to keep in touch with the people in my life that I don’t see every day. But I’ve started to realise recently that it’s a somewhat bizarre relationship that I have with these friends.
I can see what they’re up to, and they can see what I’m up to, so it almost eliminates the need for either of us to check in with each other.
Something that I thought enhanced a friendship, is in reality creating more distance.
As well as feeling a personal disconnect, I’m experiencing a societal disconnect on a massive scale.
Over the past few weeks, I have been absent from social media. I’ve given myself a self-imposed ban because I found it was affecting me in ways that it never had before.
The thing that made me decide to take a break was the reaction to Mathew Perry’s death. Now I realise that this might sound odd, but it came after weeks of social media users bombarding others with demands of accountability on matters too large for one person on Instagram or Facebook to voice.
When did it become an expectation to view all of our opinions on social media? When did social media ‘you’ become your entire self-worth?
It all feels way too serious and this just isn’t what I go online for. I want it to be an escape, a bit of fun. I want to watch funny animal videos or read about people being silly and having fun. There’s a whole lot of crap going on in the world and I need a distraction.
When Mathew Perry died it was a huge moment – I grew up watching Friends he was an icon for my generation, and rightly so, social media platforms were flooded with heartfelt tributes as soon as the news broke of his death.
And yet for a huge amount of people, this wasn’t enough, they expected more.
A surprising amount of people were angry because some of the Friends cast didn’t comment on it as quickly as they felt they should. This level of disappointment about how a person is supposed to grieve in public really shocked me.
It’s a side of social media that I hate and feel deeply uncomfortable with. The anonymity of being online provides people with the misplaced courage to act and say things that are inappropriate, uncaring, and filled with hate.
Just because you put a small part of your life out there, does it give people the right to expect more?
As someone who wants to find lightness and respite when using social media, I found that it just wasn’t working for me. As a result, I decided to delete the Apps from my phone in a bid to break an unhealthy habit.
It’s not a definitive exit, and I’m fully aware that social media isn’t an airport, and I don’t need to announce my departure, but it feels good to be taking a little break and regulating my usage to a healthier level.
Some of the things I’ve discovered are that 1) I don’t miss it, and, 2) I was frequently picking up my phone to scroll just for scrolling’s sake.
Since I put them on my phone, I actually couldn’t remember a day when I hadn’t been on social media and this is a really depressing thought. How much time have I wasted mindlessly scrolling?
Having them on your phone makes accessing this world far too easy.
The act of posting this blog has broken my self-imposed ban but I’m ok with this because while I will continue to be a user, this process has made me assess my usage, which can only be a good thing!
I have made a pact with myself to be on it less, block the people whose opinions bring me down, and make more of an effort to go out and see my friends.
Because do you know what, the alternative is this weird type of digital stalking that is extremely unhealthy and when I really think about it, a bit bloody creepy!
