I just can not bring myself to give a shit about football. I know, I know everyone keeps telling me its coming home and the general excitement everyone feels for the euros should cause a little infectious joy for this current sporting event. But the reality is that win or lose I actually couldn’t give a damn.
I’m sure the general consensus is the opposite to my opinion – judging by the levels of hysteria that many people currently have on display, I do feel like I’m in the minority. Even the father of my children, who by and large has held very little affection for the game in the 17 years we have spent together, now has been suckered into this football fever. I am sat here watching the semi finals of a game that I don’t really care for with a man who has suddenly put his lad hat on and wants to cheer on the boys. Although he has just said to me that if he was a footballer, he would wear camouflaged football boots – I can only assume it is to confuse and disarm the opponent – I didn’t ask for clarification because he started describing in detail how he would stick grass on to the boots to increase his camouflage….
The only real football content that I sign up for has been following comedian Rob Beckett’s instagram as he uploads stories from Wembley. The highs and lows of this guy is comedy gold as we watch him drink too much and then get front row tickets to his horrendous hangover the following day which involves school runs, putting the bins out and taking his kids swimming. If you haven’t caught it I would highly recommend catching up on it on his highlight reel.
Anyway, I digress, It’s coming home apparently, and it looks like England are going through to the final and I must say I like the story/journey of Gareth Southgate, he absolutely deserves it. The commentator just said ‘take note of where you are and who you are with’ as it pans to all the painted faces, England flags and singing fans (feat ACTUAL Badiel and Skinner) and I can honestly say, hand on heart, that I still don’t give a shit!